Neuroscience for Real Life: Your Nervous System is Talking [Part 1]
Why You Feel the Way You Do. The Polyvagal Theory.
Performance is often viewed through the lens of strategy, skill, and communication.
But beneath those surface-level tools lies a deeper influence: the nervous system.
Did you know that beneath our apparent ability to stay in control of our thoughts and behaviours, we are the majority of the time being guided by our primitive brain?
That means a nervous system is silently shaping how we think, feel, and relate to the world around us.
So when you feel anxious, overwhelmed, or shut down… that’s not just a “mood”.
That’s your biology doing exactly what it was designed to do.
Recently, I discovered Polyvagal Theory , and it completely changed how I understand emotional regulation, connection, and human performance.
▶️ Watch this 30-no second clip of tonic immobility in nature
In nature, a gazelle caught by a predator often goes completely still, not dead, just frozen.
It’s called tonic immobility, and it’s the nervous system’s last effort to survive.
Humans do this too.
Not on the savanna, but in meetings, arguments, daily overwhelm, burnout, or trauma.
There’s so much valuable insight here that, as part of my interest in neuroscience and my exploration of tools that support Purposeful Personal Excellence, I’ve decided to split this content into a 3-part mini-series:
Part 1: Why You Feel the Way You Do. The Polyvagal Theory.
Part 2: How Your Nervous System Influences Your Emotions, Energy, and Everyday Interactions
Part 3: How Co-Regulation Shapes Your Energy, Emotions, and Everyday Relationships
But let me introduce you today:
What is the Polyvagal Theory
The 3 core Polygaval states
5 Everyday ways to work with your nervous system
Final thought
Let’s dive in! 🤿
What is the Polyvagal theory?
Developed by neuroscientist Dr. Stephen Porges, the Polyvagal Theory explains how your nervous system constantly scans your environment for signs of safety or danger.
This process is called neuroception.
This happens automatically before thoughts and before decisions.
The 3 core Polygaval states
Depending on what your body senses, it shifts into one of three core states:
Ventral Vagal: the state of connection and calm
This is your safe state.
In this state, you feel:
Clear and focused
Able to connect with others
Curious, compassionate, confident
When you're in your Ventral Vagal status, life feels manageable.
Sympathetic: the state of Fight or Flight
This is when your body feels danger and it shifts into mobilization.
You move into a state of urgency and activation.
In this state, you might feel:
Anxious, restless, impatient
Driven to act (or overreact)
Easily irritated or overwhelmed
The Sympathetic state isn’t “bad.” It’s your body protecting you, but it’s not meant to be permanent.
Dorsal Vagal: the state of Freeze and Shutdown
If the danger feels too big to fight or escape, your body may go into shutdown.
This is a protective freeze state.
You might feel:
Numb, detached, disconnected
Hopeless, fatigued, unmotivated
Like the world is happening around you, not with you
The Dorsal Vagal is your system saying: I can’t cope. I need to shut down.
5 Everyday ways to work with your nervous system
The good news? Your nervous system is malleable.
You can learn to recognize your state and gently shift it.
This is called self-regulation: the art of calming your own system through breath, movement, awareness, and co-regulation with others.
Your body wants to come back to balance. You just need to give it the tools.
These small practices help you move back toward safety, connection, and calm:
Breathe low and slow
Why it works: Deep, slow breathing regulates the vagus nerve and signals safety to your body.
Try: Inhale for 4 seconds, exhale for 6. Repeat for 2–3 minutes.
Move your body
Why it works: Physical movement releases built-up stress and shifts stuck energy.
Try: Walk, stretch, shake out your arms — even 30 seconds helps.
Soften your voice and face
Why it works: Facial expression and vocal tone influence your nervous system — smiling or speaking gently can cue calm.
Try: Slight smile, relaxed jaw, gentle tone.
Connect with someone safe
Why it works: Co-regulation through human (or even pet) connection restores a sense of safety.
Try: Call or text a friend, hug a loved one, or make eye contact with someone kind.
Ground through your senses
Why it works: Sensory grounding pulls you out of mental loops and back into the body.
Try: Notice 3 things you can see, 2 you can touch, 1 you can hear.
Final Thought
You’re not broken.
You’re not overreacting.
You’re responding to cues of safety or danger, just like your body is wired to.
When you begin to notice and work with your nervous system, life gets softer. Not because the world changes, but because you do.
References
Polyvagal Institute: Link
Explore articles, education, and tools developed by Dr Stephen Porges and leading practitioners of Polyvagal Theory.
Dr Stephen W. Porges: Link
Discover the original research, publications, and interviews from the neuroscientist behind Polyvagal Theory.
See you next week. 👋
Disclaimer: The information provided in this newsletter and related resources is intended for informational and educational purposes only. It reflects both researched facts and my personal views. It does not constitute professional advice. Any actions taken based on the content of this newsletter are at the reader's discretion.